Inquiry: “My Partner Left Me…”

Participant: I’m hurt by K****, my partner, because he left me.

Katie: So “He left you”—is that true?

Participant: Not really; in my heart he is there all the time.

Katie: So how do you react when you think the thought “He left me”? What happens? You’re living your life, you’re very happy, and then the thought hits, “Crrrrgh!”—“He left me.”

Participant: I feel inferior, or worthless. I feel very much alone, helpless, and I just don’t know what to do.

Katie: And I would put “I don’t know what to do” on a separate piece of paper, and Work it later. So, “He left me”—who would you be without that thought? Who are you without that thought as you live your life?

Participant: I feel free, secure, content.

Katie: So close your eyes. Now watch you, going to the market, doing the dishes, without the thought “He left me.” What do you see? Watch your life.

Participant: I see many people, and I join with them in a very good time, and I have freedom inside.

Katie: Yes, you have your life back.

Participant: Yes.

Katie: “He left me”—turn it around.

Participant: I left him.

Katie: So when you were with him, give me examples of how you would leave him when you were with him.

Participant: For a long period of time, I didn’t think of him. I had intimate situations with others. I didn’t feel well with him.

Katie: Yes…yes. So you’re just like him! “He left me”—can you find another turnaround?

Participant: He didn’t leave me?

Katie: Yes. You love him; he’s in your heart. Can you find another turnaround?

Participant: I left him in my thoughts.

Katie: Yes, and I found one, would you like to hear it?

Participant: Yes.

Katie: “I left myself.”

Participant: Yes. This is true.

Katie: When you mentally go into his life and who he should be with, you leave you. You move into a dictatorship, and that’s very painful, running people’s lives, and telling them who they should be with, and who they shouldn’t be with. And then you feel that. It’s the opposite of caring and love. Thank you, precious.

Participant: Thank you.

Find your own worksheet, here.

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  1. 24April. Came home from work. He just left a note and took all his belongings. was getting married on the 17 May. He left me with the house rent and other stuff 2 pay. My salary wont make it. I am not angry. Just dissapointed. Plz can somebody relate to my story. I do love him and want him back and everything must just change back to normal. Plz help me. . .

  2. I feel responsible for my life and become more and more aware of who I am. When my brother lately painfully opened a can of hurt from many years ago I was mad at first, and by acting the way I was used to, by running away from the situation, I felt I was hurt and had betrayed myself. Becoming aware that I was not mad at him but created this situation by thinking this might happen when I would encounter him, made me gratefull for the insight.
    I just learned from your website and feel great joy of meeting you.
    Thank you for sharing the sharable.
    Speaking of sharing, I want to offer my help when needed, I am dutch, live in spain and I speak 4 languages fluently. (dutch, english, german and spanish)Angela Verhoog

  3. I understand the thought I left her she left me. and the answer who did what .

    Question I have is why do we do just that in a relationship or even meeting new people that seem to please us .

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