Whose Business Are You In?

Notice when you hurt that you are mentally out of your business.

If you’re not sure, stop and ask, “Mentally, whose business am I in?”

There are only three kinds of business in the universe: mine, yours, and God’s.

Whose business is it if an earthquake happens? God’s business.

Whose business is it if your neighbor down the street has an ugly lawn? Your neighbor’s business.

Whose business is it if you are angry at your neighbor down the street because he has an ugly lawn? Your business.

Life is simple—it is internal.

Count, in five minute intervals, how many times you are in someone else’s business mentally. Notice when you give uninvited advice or offer your opinion about something (aloud or silently).

Ask yourself: “Am I in their business? Did they ask me for my advice?” And more importantly, “Can I take the advice I am offering and apply it to my life?”

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25 comments

  1. I’ve been working on this one myself for sometime. I always seem to butt into other people’s business and tell them how to live my life. Thanks for the new angle!

  2. I’d love to find another word/idea instead of “God” in the three types of business. It’s a really powerful statement, but doesn’t work for those folks who either aren’t religious or believe that they are a part of God (as in Pantheism, Gaia, etc.).

    I imagine that there must be another way to explain the part of reality that is not in our control in a way that doesn’t include the idea of things being in some external, superior being’s control. Any suggestions?

    Thanks! And glad to see you blogging Katie!

  3. I am in everyone’s business but my own. There are those who seek me out for advice and those I listen too and offer advice and those that I just say what I believe is their issues.

    However, I know that all of this is my own business that I am offering advice on. The individuals around me say I am the most positive person they know, however at times I don’t feel very positive about anything in my life. I am struggling to survive, emotionally, financially, spiriturally and in other aspects. I feel like a hamster must feel on its wheel. I would very much love to get off and have a good life. One that is spiritually enlightening and empowering, emotionally fulfilling and financially satisfying.

    Where do I begin?

  4. Wow… I just read this after being referred to your blog from another blog and it just grabbed me. I never stopped to fully realize how much energy was expelled on business that was not my own and when you write it so simply, it makes me want to slap my forehead in amazement!

    I really am going to make an effort at staying within my own business and waiting until other people ask me for assistance or advice on their business.

    Thank you!
    Erin

  5. Whose Business Am I In?

    How true and practical. This advice helps me focus and remain focused in the now and on “my own business”. It frees my “mind space” a lot. Thank you.

    Bruno

  6. “I’d love to find another word/idea instead of “God” in the three types of business. I imagine that there must be another way to explain the part of reality that is not in our control in a way that doesn’t include the idea of things being in some external, superior being’s control. Any suggestions?”

    Katie often says “Reality” instead of “God.” Because, like God, Reality rules. I am either in my business, your business or Reality’s business.

  7. Billy L. thanks for the suggestion, I’m wondering if there is a way to clearly define for those who aren’t familliar with Katie (or the philosophy of non-duality) the difference between the reality that we can’t control and the reality that we can. Using the term God’s business compared to “our” business is useful for those who’s stories include the idea of God being a seperate entity, but this description doesn’t really help those who’s stories don’t include a God at all, or who believe that God is not seperate from us.

    I work with a lot of people who are younger and non-traditional, and I love sharing The Work and Katie’s ideas with them, but they aren’t likely to be able to use those ideas if I don’t frame the ideas in ways that make sense to them.

    So, yeah, I’m still really hoping to find a more universal term for “not our” business. Any other suggestions?

  8. Hi Turil,

    ‘Not our’ (or rather ‘not my’) business sounds pretty universal to me 🙂

    For me it feels like the important point is to notice that I am not in my business, rather than the definition of who’s business I am in – if it is not my business it is to time to get out of it – it is merely a signpost that suggests a direction back to my own business.

    With love,

    Jon

  9. Maybe the reason you cannot think of another way to “frame” the three kinds of business is a reflection on the fact that the concept itself is faulty. If there is no God who is all powerful, omiscient, and omnipresent, as the Christian God is said to be, then there is no such thing as “God’s business.” When you see your neighbor’s suffering,and it is not God’s business –who’s business is it? Maybe it really IS our business to provide help for that neighbor.

    In a similar way Katie is fond of saying that her healthcare is her doctor’s business, not hers–“He’s the one who went to school, not me.” But, that statement implies lack of responsiblity for self neglect. A diabetic, for example, must take control of his or her own blood sugar levels. You cannot expect the doctor to be at your side constantly making choices for what you eat and how much insulin you take.

    I would like to see my comments get posted and I would like to see some discussion about the underlying premises in the three kinds of business–is the concept useful, or does it actually have potential to cause harm?
    Thank you.

  10. I think what Katie means by her “body is her doctor’s business” (it is silly for me to interpret her words–but I will)is that a “clear mind” can hear what the doctor says, and then either follow directives or not–it would all depend on what story arises upon “hearing” what the doctor says. “The Work is not about healing the body, Katie often says, the work is about healing our thinking.” Bodies will do what they will do, and all the thinking in the world can’t change that. But, the power of the work resides in loving anything and everything our thoughts conjure up about our bodies, and allowing the 4 questions to uncover the fears we hold about our bodies, so we can come to “see” what is for each one of us.
    I’m one of those who have trouble with the G word. What works for me is “reality or what is this moment” I can call that God for lack of a better word because “what is” is always here now, and I have no control or say about it. Someone close to me is sick–I get sad, I worry, I also know that what I feel is the fear of losing that person–of losing someone who adds something to me. It’s my thoughts about this person or situation that make me sad or happy. So, once again, it’s my thinking–my story–that is trying to manipulate what is in order to make me feel safe.

  11. Is funny but when we are possesed by a desire to help others we are not really thinking whos business we are. Or even if we are on someone elses business it only happens naturaly..however sometimes in the middle of the action a thought might occur to us..like, why am i doing this? or i should stop im helping too much …or my help is not been appreciated..i should not have offered my help…etc etc etc ..all of this is really the story that wants to take over a simple action pure and honest action.. at that point i would stop only to examine my thoughts and then i will happyly resume my action…..thanks

    1. Simple. Deep. Difficult. Genuine. MBI coach training.

      We can love our children and spouses. Family. Friends. Can we control them? You can take all the precautions and care to prevent disaster. To keep people safe. Training with every possible expert in every field. Yet again, is their life their choice? Out of our control? Their business? We if we do what is possible to help. Like providing water. If they choose not to drink they will dye. Is that our fault?
      It hurts BIG not agreeing with choices they are liable to make, but how can you be in their business 24/7. Put them in a cage? Is that life? Or is that living hell?

      Sounds heartless, I know. But LOVE is anything BUT heartless. If love isn’t enough, what is?
      Tell me where I’m wrong, please.

    1. Ultimately, whatever you think a higher power or source to be will suffice for your interpretation of God. Universe, higher self or power, source…seem to work for me. I am comfortable with God as well. It IS MY BUSINESS so God is whoever I believe God to be! And ______ works for you! And tomorrow it may be another word meaning God, to YOU! It is YOUR business:) hugs!

  12. Life is not all internal! In your June 1 article, ‘it’s no one’s biz’: what’s suddently wrong with ‘transparency’? If everyone knew what everyone makes, and is worth, the world could deal openly with the difficult, and culturally destructive, emotions of jealousy, envy, self-doubt, rage against the system, hate thy neighbor… we might find it rewarding to walk in others’ shoes. Difficult, but rewarding. We need a gentler, more open, more honest society, and that starts with each one of us. It’s easy for some one like you to advocate to the contrary. After all, you’ve made yours, and so you turn to the side of secrecy and opacity, to protect yourself. How about other folks? How about your society?

  13. I really like this communication. I noticed did many of the comments were concerning God’s business. Whether it’s God’s business or your neighbor’s business is of little importance; in fact, it is of no importance.The important fact is it’s none of my business.

  14. Thanks so much for this wisdom, it’s made a big difference in my life.

    I had the misfortune of growing up with an extremely controlling father, one who would rarely mind his own business and repeatedly violated my boundaries. The result was a lot of fighting because he kept forcing his way into my space. Those four words would have diminished so much of the family violence if they had been heeded.

    In my case, the violence and violations ultimately became intolerable and after many decades of abuse, I ended contact with my entire family. One member in particular would never heed the words “Mind your own business,” and for me, it was the breaking point.

    Again, your words and teachings have helped me greatly over the years. I am most grateful for your teachings.

  15. All of the words posted are lovely. We learn. We grow. Thank you all for the thoughts posted. My experience in this lifetime has shaped beliefs from what I thought was expected. Until I went within. Silently, in solitude. Call it what you will. It, and words from people like Louise Hay, Byron Katie, Martha Beck, Charles Haanel, Mike Dooley, have changed my beliefs. Beliefs that shape thoughts, visions and results.
    Our culture doesn’t talk about death, yet experiencing my father’s journey through healthy 94 years, and into hospice in our home in 2 short months, his body dying in 11 days; confirmed my beliefs about the universal mind and powers that exist and work through us. The universal mind, power, source works through us. We ARE blessed with a gift. It’s energy (God, universe, source, higher power) ability to experience life as humans;. This energy living through us temporarily (whatever length our lives result in regardless of how brief). I agree with authors writings and research facts about energy always is; cannot create it or destroy it. It can change form/shape. I believe this is what is experienced through birth and death in this world we are currently given the gift to experience.
    This is my business. The first time shared with others. Your beliefs are your business. If this correlates with anyone it is serving.
    Powerful words by Charles Haanel that build confidence in our beliefs: “I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, and happy.” (The Master Key System, 1912). Go within. Find your truths. Live them. Peace.

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