Video: “I’m Too Fat”


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  1. “An immature mind is mind that hates itself.” Wow, wow, wow, I need to sit with this. Also what stays with me is the client’s image of herself alive in a coffin. To lie to oneself = living death. I love the courage and willingness of the lady in the hot seat.

  2. Oh if God the gift did give us to see ourselves as others see us- Robert Burns
    We are surrounded by negative thoughts of our looks but we need to look at our beauty that comes from within as other people do.
    Well done to the lady in the hot seat Bravo

  3. Tears run down my cheeks…it is so true! Until we question our thoughts, there is an immense difference between how we see ourselves and are seen by others and through the eyes of love. What a wonderful video and message (again)..I just lóve these tapes and talks. When I observe the people who are investigating their pain with Katie, I feel moved, touched, so deeply loving them all. Is it true that what one recognizes in the “other” is only possible if present in ourselves? Then we are all love.

    Anna Brothar
    The Netherlands

  4. i love seeing this happen: the Work in action. Anything we THINK or BELIEVE our bodies to be is a step away from what it really is. Any label, name, and description to the body is un-necessary and falls away. Firstly because all thoughts are transient and ever-changing, and secondly, no word or thought can match the beauty that is your body. It is an indescribable life form, beautiful beyond words.

    i love the Work, and
    i love Byron katie,
    and thus i begin to love my self.


  5. How amazing to witness the in-progress transformation of this woman! Body image is a really entrenched issue for so many women, and she seems to be making a real breakthrough for herself, right in front of our eyes. So powerful to watch.

  6. “Imagination doesn’t have the question ‘is it true?”, so in my mind my belly can expand, and expand, growing bigger and bigger, this belly of mine. If I can’t think the thought ‘my belly is too big’ then I’m living ,peacefully, and my belly, my nose and the flowers or the neighbourhoodcat are equally beautiful parts of the world aroud me.
    Thank you, Katie, for the truth which you are giving back to me.

    Geertje, the Netherlands

  7. This is a very moving and powerful video! It shows how our negative self perceptions are just like death. This sweet, beautiful lady was able to break through the false beliefs that were keeping her walled up in a coffin of her own making. It’s an honor to watch her rebirth….into a world of love!

  8. “imature mind it’s a mind that hate itself” what doea it mean???
    imaturity comes romf lack of knowledg and expereance – i think – so what does the hate has to do with it ?

  9. How glorious to be reminded that we are more than our thoughts. The newsletter arrived on just the right day at the right moment when my world and how I perceived myself was unfolding into criticism and despair. The work and Byron Katie’s style shows well the truth and nothing but ther truth.. Blessings and thank you. Hugs and loving all Gwynne

  10. Just shows how cruel our minds can be – this lady is beautiful!

    And here’s the transcript.

    With love, Jon

    Video: Inquiry – “I’m Too Fat”

    P: My body shouldn’t be fat.

    BK: Is that true?

    P: Yeah

    BK: And is it?

    P: Yeah

    BK: So what’s the reality of it?

    P: It’s fat.

    BK: And how do you react when you think the thought “My body shouldn’t be fat” and it is?

    P: Sad, angry, depressed.

    BK: And who would you be without the thought “My body is fat”?

    P: Well, I’d definitely be free from this thinking so….

    BK: So close your eyes and imagine you with your friends, imagine you going to work, driving your car, whatever it is, whatever your life is like, imagine your life without the thought “I’m too fat”.

    P: Wow, it’s beautiful.

    BK: Wow

    P: I saw lots of laughter and connection, it was beautiful, I was present and I was able to really engage with people.

    BK: You got to see you the way we see you.

    BK: Honey, welcome home to your beautiful self.

    P: Thank you.

    BK: That’s how we see you.

    P: It’s great freedom.

    BK: So notice the difference with the thought and without the thought.

    P: With the thought the image is being in a coffin alive and dirt being shovelled down on me.

    P: Without it, it’s sunshine and freedom. And love.

    BK: So is your body bringing on your misery or your thoughts about your body bringing on your misery?

    P: Right now I really see that it’s my thoughts and I didn’t believe that before.

    BK: 100 percent of your misery is brought on by your dishonest, unconscious thinking. That’s what a lie feels like.

    BK: “I’m too fat”, turn it around, can you find another turn a round?

    P: “My thinking is definitely too fat.”

    BK: Feel how heavy it makes you. If you are a 100 pounds and you think you are too fat, you imagine yourself at 120, 150, 200. It’s not about the body, it’s about imagination.

    P: Yeah

    BK: Imagination allowed to run wild because it doesn’t have the question “Is it true?” to stop it, so that it can reconsider, so that it can bring itself to sanity.

    BK: And sanity is a word I equate with love, with intelligence and maturity.

    BK: An immature mind is a mind that hates itself.

  11. Hi,
    I’ve just been introduced to BK books and in theory I get it but am finding it very difficult to work on myself (not sure how to get to the bare bones of what my turnaround should be).
    I’m only about 30lbs overweight but haven’t been able to really budge it for 10 years. I know it’s my thinking. I’m sick of thinking about being overweight all the time. I’m sick of looking at myself in the mirror and thinking I should look different to be ok with myself. What I want if did lose weight is the confidence to get naked with someone I cared about. I don’t have that confidence so of course no relationship/love. What is the question I should be asking and what is the turn around.

  12. Hi Rose,

    Based on what you have shared here, two beliefs I would work on are:

    My body is 30lbs overweight
    My body should be different

    Also, you could write out a Judge-Your-Neighbor worksheet about your body and inquire into the statements you fill in.

    If these are beliefs that you’ve had for a long time you may find that you inquire into them more than once – the belief that “My body is too fat” comes up for me every now and again, which simply means I haven’t worked through it fully yet.

    As for getting the confidence to be naked with someone else, all I suggest is inquiring into the stressful thoughts you have about your body and then see what happens. If you find yourself close to that situation and stress appears, you can go lock yourself in the bathroom and do the work on those thoughts 🙂

    Also, you might want to take your statements and add ‘and it means that….’ and fill that in – for example, does it mean that no-one would love your body as it is – that could be inquired into.

    If you are interested there is a Yahoo group where you can post inquiries and get help/feedback – you’ll find it at:


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