Video: What is the School for The Work?

The School for The Work is a nine-day experience.— the ultimate inner adventure. Unlike every other school on earth, this one isn’t for learning, —it’s for unlearning. Spend nine days losing the fear-based stories you’ve innocently clung to all your life. They might be stories like “I’m not good enough,” or “I need a partner,” or “I’ll never get over it,” or “I have to be in control.” Who would you be without these stressful stories?

Learn more about the School for The Work, here.

 

New Products

New products at www.storeforthework.com

Baseball T-Shirt, Inquiry is my Work outbaseball-t

Is inquiry your favorite workout? This baseball inspired T has 3/4 contrast sleeves and is made from Eco Jersey for the ultimate in sustainable comfort. With a slight shirttail hemline, this T features marrow stitching detail.

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Muffins, Ritalin, and JuiceSFTW_DVD_Muffin2015

A young woman tearfully blames her mother for numbing her on Ritalin for twelve years and asks Byron Katie to fix her. Beliefs fall away as they question thoughts like “She made me feel like I did something wrong,” “I need mom to give me my list time back.” Eventually, laughter replaces tears as she realizes that “No one can fix me!” “Reality is always what you’re looking for,” Katie says. ” It’s consistent, and it’s kind.”

Video Interview: Parenting and The End of Blame

Parenting and The End of Blame

Nicole Telfer of http://www.empoweredkids.co.uk interviews Byron Katie on parenting:

Q: Can you help us understand what lies beneath those emotional triggers? Why are kids so good at pushing our buttons?

Katie: If I see them the way they are, then we’re connected. If I see the old them of the past, it influences the way I see them now. The problem lies with me, not with my child. When we stop blaming the child and look to ourselves, that’s when real change begins.

Q: My kids don’t listen to me. The only way I can get them to do as I say is to yell and scream.

Katie: When I think they’re not listening to me, am I listening to them? No one is guilty. There are just two people who love each other trying to communicate.

Q: How can we tell when we’re observing behavior, that is something they need to address, or if it’s something they’re mirroring in us that we need to address?

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Q: How can I use The Work so that I can stay grounded? Sometimes I just lose it.

Katie: Sometimes we can’t connect. Later, I’d get a Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet, I’d close my eyes, and I’d imagine myself back into that situation when I was frustrated with my child. I’d imagine us, just the way we were, and I would identify thoughts I was thinking in that situation. The Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet is made for this. It wasn’t my child who caused my anger; it’s what I was thinking and believing.

Then I would question each thought, using the four questions and the turnarounds.

Example: He doesn’t listen to me.

1. Is it true? (Yes or no.)

I’d close my eyes and I witness what I said to them, the emotions I felt.

2. Can I absolutely know that it’s true?

3. How do I react, what happens, when I believe that thought?

I see that I put my hands on my hips. I gave my child “the look.”
I threw up my hands.
I can see so clearly how I reacted when I believed the thought “He doesn’t listen to me.”

4. Who would I be without the thought?

The Turnarounds:
I don’t listen to me. I wasn’t listening to the things I was saying. I wasn’t taking my own advise. I just kept talking to him in that oblivious way.

I don’t listen to him.

He does listen to me.

Then I look at that situation and it shows me examples of how the turnaround is as true or truer.

Even if a child is trying to drown me out, he hears me. By going back to situation and witnessing, I can always see where that child is listening.

When we really listen, we can hear the signals that our children are giving us, and they wake us up.

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If there’s a problem in my house, I look to myself. That’s very empowering, because no one has to change other than me. That’s what husbands and children are for; they push our buttons so that we can get free.

Q: As parents, how can we continue to teach our kids to keep practicing The Work, so they can find the peace within themselves?

Q: How can I use The Work to deal with my need for approval so I don’t put that onto my kids?

Q: My twelve-year-old daughter has become very closed. She won’t open up and tell me about her day or her interactions with her friends. I feel like I’m locked out of her life. How can I find my way back in?

Nicole: The biggest life lesson I’ve taken away from your Work is that the whole purpose for these close, connected relationships is to teach me more about myself. They stand up and show me where I need to grow. And your book for children, Tiger-Tiger, Is It True? allowed me to introduce the whole process to my kids at a really young age.

“If think they need to turn it around, I need to turn it around.
If I think someone should question their thoughts, I need to question my thoughts.” —Byron Katie

New DVDs

In this intimate session between a man and a woman, we see the struggles of two people in love. Watch Jason honestly express his anger and frustration, and watch Ellie hear him without judgment. Witness as Jason questions his mind and discovers, to his amazement, that she is the mirror of his thinking. His discoveries clearly show us that what we’re believing about our partner’s anger can cost us the wisdom they’re offering. Can Jason open his mind to where Ellie is right? Can we really hear our partner under all circumstances? This viewing is an eye-opener for all those who are in a relationship, and for all those who aren’t.DVD_TriesToControlMe2_1024x1024A son is hurt because he can’t help or please his mother. “I want Mom to tell me that she loves me.” “Mom should stop saying no.” “I need her to enjoy something I give her.” When he believes these thoughts, he is miserable. But when he questions them, he realizes that he doesn’t need her to do or be anything.

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“God should make my life easier, reward me, and remove my suffering”—is it true? Byron Katie does The Work with a man who thinks he is a failure and a victim. “When we believe our stressful thoughts, we cost ourselves the awareness of a benevolent presence in our lives,” Katie says. Watch as he gets a glimpse of who he is without the thoughts that put him at war with reality and with himself. DVD_GodYouShould_1024x1024

A woman is devastated because her fiancé has cancelled their wedding, calling her a whore. Through inquiry, her confusion clears as she sees that she is the one clinging to the past. Whens she discovers what actually happened rather than her story of it, her shame and anger change to delight.

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Available at: Store For The Work of Byron Katie

You Can Now Have A Tiger – Tiger T

Send us pictures of the adorable children in your lives wearing the Tiger-Tiger T-Shirt so we can feature them! #theworkintheworld

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This classic tee is a great fit for babies, toddles and youth. This classic cotton tee from American Apparel is digitally printed with Tiger-Tiger on the front. Tiger-Tiger is the main character in the book, Tiger-Tiger Is It True? with Byron Katie and Hans Wilhelm.

Thought Thursday

On Parents and Children

“My parents are responsible for my belief systems and my problems”—is it true? No, I’m the one who’s responsible. Knowing this gives us what we always wanted: absolute control. And with this technology of going inside, it’s the end of suffering, if we want to be free. -Byron Katie

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Thought Thursday

On Love, Sex and Relationships

 

“When you don’t love the other person, it hurts, because love is your very self. And you can’t make yourself do it! You can’t make yourself love someone. But when you come to love yourself, you automatically love the other person. You can’t not. Just as you can’t make yourself love us, you can’t make yourself not love us. It’s all your projection.” -Byron Katie

What are your thoughts? Please share!

 

Find all these quotes on www.storeforthework.com 

Life after the School

I would love to share with you, especially since some of you are personally part of my journey to my homecoming by being available to work with me, what I answered for the School Reunion Webcast and what has changed for me:

Life with my 6 yr. old daughter has become much more peaceful. I stay calmer, it´s easier for me to stay present and not go into stories of the past and the future. This helps tremendously in not overreacting to what´s happening here and now. I have found the many ways I try for people to like me (and how I perform) and I keep finding ME more and more often by asking “do I like being with myself in that moment with what I do/don´t do, how I do it, how I perceive it, what I think about it”. I find that recognition from the outside suddenly becomes less of a requisite anymore. I´m starting to deeply feel again and being touched by music, laughter, hugs, the beauty of the patterns of my curtains and how sensual they feel on my body when I stand next to them and the wind blows them onto me. I´m at the same time scared shitless to lose it again and return to that needy, anxious, desperate & separate place. I will keep on WORKing until I´m being it.

A very big thank you to you D.L.! You gave me hope by shortly sharing your story with me and how it all changed for you sticking to it and you.

And such a heartfelt thank you to all of you wonderful, generous people who take the time to do The Work and who are available to me when I call on you.

E. J.

The School for The Work

The School for The Work
Sunday–Tuesday, 28 September–7 October 2014
Ojai, California

Join us for the ultimate inner adventure. Spend nine days losing the fear-based stories you’ve innocently clung to all your life. At the School you’ll discover that your stories are everyone’s, and everyone’s stories are yours. You’ll be supported so you can be completely yourself without fear of judgment, perhaps for the first time in your life.

The School curriculum is a living, evolving process, changing with the needs of the participants and on the basis of past students’ experiences. The exercises and activities are designed to mirror the transformation Katie went through after her experience of waking up to reality in 1986. She is present with you from morning to night, directing every exercise, answering your questions, and commenting on your feedback. You will be supported in issues such as men and women, relationships, children and parents, body image, God, death and dying, addiction, money, and work.

The School for The Work is an immersion in self-inquiry. Each day during the School you may find yourself feeling freer and happier than the day before. Old habits may fall away like outworn clothes. You may find yourself eager to get up in the morning so that you won’t miss a moment of this unfolding adventure with your own mind.

Learn more about the School for The Work, by clicking here.

 

Contact Information
Call 805.444.5799 or +1 805.444.5799

 

Letter: From Sylvia

Dear Katie,

I wish to participate again in the nine-day School for the Work to be held in July this year. It is my hope that I will gain some more experience and would work towards being certificated.

Ever since I left the School last year on the 28th of July 2013 my life was a complete change. I now watch my diet and do morning walks and as a result my blood pressure is no longer alarming to the extent that my physician reduced the quantity intake of my medication. I realised that going through inquiry helped me to be in touch with my inner self. I had not forgiven my late husband Maston Vumbunu for transmitting the deadly virus HIV to me, but I wrote a letter to apologise to him at the School, which was a major turning point. The letter made me forgive him and appreciate so many things that he had done for me for the seven years we were married.

That made me change the way I talk to my son about him. It made my son ask me what really transpired at the School of the Work. My son had noticed a great change in my stories about his father. I now talk good about him.

I also noticed that the stressful thoughts are universal. There are no thoughts which belong to HIV positive people only, therefore discovering that The Work is for all people e.g. HIV negative people, cancer patients, gay and lesbians, the old, and even children and teenagers.

I now face my thoughts head-on with inquiry. The Work is an ongoing process in my life. All I need is pen and paper to lead me to freedom.

Being the eldest child in a family of five, I was always out of my way and in my siblings’ business, creating more stress for myself. Now because of The Work, I can give room to my siblings to solve their own problems. When an issue comes to my attention, I question whether it is my business, theirs, or God’s. The Work also helped me not to fight with reality because I will never win the war.

We had a self stigma course using “inquiry-based stress reduction: The Work of Bryon Katie” (IBSR), which left me very liberated when we came back from the School. I no longer want to be treated with special care at funerals, church gatherings, etc. I also questioned so many thoughts involving my HIV status.

I also gained as a facilitator and as participant. We did “popcorn” and realised that The Work is for everyone, i.e facilitator and participant. I used to think that since I was involved in so many HIV workshops and also an HIV activist, I would not stigmatise myself. I realised that I had so many occasions and instances whereby I stigmatised myself and those around me.

My vision on how to move The Work in Zimbabwe among the people living with HIV is to cascade The Work, first to all the support groups in the capital city Harare and then Zimbabwe as a whole so that many people benefit. Also to have more local facilitators receiving training at the School for the Work, for I hope to see The Work moving to other provinces in Zimbabwe, since ZNNP+ has support groups throughout the country . I also hope that one day the School for The Work will be done in Africa in Zimbabwe and have local Certified Facilitators.

My commitment to move The Work is to give all I can, 100%. I will use my weekends and other afternoons to do The Work with the participants. I also created a whatsapp and a Facebook group chats for the Community of the Work in Zimbabwe. We watch videos and listen to audios from BKI. I take it upon myself to remind members of the Community to come for The Work and encourage them to read books by Byron Katie.

So far I contributed in translating the yellow card in our native language. I am now working on translating the sheet “Instructions for Doing the Work “.

I hope this information will meet your expectation and favourable consideration.

Yours Faithfully,
Sylivia V