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A woman from Denmark asks, “How do you know when it’s time to make changes? You get to love everything as it is, but still, Katie, you make changes, for instance, you left Paul, your ex-husband. So I’m confused, because I am happy and content, but I still feel a need to change my life. I can always find a way to love what is, but then am I not being true to myself?”
Byron Katie answers, “I didn’t change my life; I lived a yes to my own heart’s desire. Even though I was married to Paul, I found a deeper marriage: to my inner voice. So I became only answerable to that. The only thing that could stop me from living out of that was fear. Love is a fearless state of mind. I had no other reason except that yes to leave Paul. I began to travel and was very rarely home. That was too much for him. He naturally began to make another life for himself, and I’m grateful for that. So the change came from inside. If you’re afraid to make a change, write your fearful thoughts on a Worksheet and set yourself free to make change, or not.
“There are no do’s or don’ts. Inquiry is about the end of suffering. It’s freedom to ask anything of anyone, and then trust that they’ll say yes or no. Freedom doesn’t look the way we think. It’s just a natural flow of words, and humor, and life. I know there is this precious place of no past and no future. The Work can open us to that. This precious place is always there. It’s always to be trusted, unfailingly.”
As the mind changes, life changes. —Byron Katie